I have some friends from high school (dark ages) who I still encounter in emails and all that. One was an editor for Rolling Stone and the other is a Hollywood guy.
To be blunt, I have had a number of friends who work for the CIA. I found them to be honorable and ethically beyond reproach and as good and normal as it gets. My two friends referenced above don't hold that view and it has caused a certain degree of strain even though our friendships go back half a century.
I'm prompted to write this entry due to my wife's sage observation regarding the CIA field officers killed by the Jordanian double agent this past week. She noted that now these guys are selfless patriots and heros of the first order, risking everything probably 24/7 to do America's work. That is indeed true. They are every bit the hero as the GI grunt on patrol in Iraq or anywhere else for that matter. HOWEVER, a few years ago the CIA was portrayed as a gutted shell of an organization that was the original gang that couldn't shoot straight - remember? All ills were laid at their feet and the personnel were villified at every turn.
So now we realize that their jobs are horribly dangerous and thankless. It would occur to some (or should) that these dearly departed probably have families and friends and they spent their holiday not by some cozy fire at grandma's house but in one of the most god-foresaken areas of the world doing this nation's work LIKE THEN HAVE ALWAYS DONE AND WILL FOREVER DO.
Her observation is the key to the discord between me and my half century old friends. We perhaps overcome it because we have a transcendent friendship. But as a nation that has no real bond with these people, it takes their deaths to come to grips with our on failings - number one on that list is pointing fingers at people who don't deserve it.